How do I find other lesbians?
The dating game is not a game. It’s a ferocious battle wrought with challenges such as anxiety, trickery and a great deal of heartbreak. Everyone loses repeatedly, and when you do win, the prize is more dating and more of the aforementioned challenges.
But we all want to play. It’s human nature to want to meet strangers and build bonds that may or may not develop into full-blown relationships. But, as we’ve just established, this process isn’t easy. And when you’re gay, it’s even less easy. As a heterosexual person, it’s fair to assume that everyone you meet is either straight and available or straight and taken. This isn’t always true, of course – if everyone fit into these two categories, I wouldn’t be writing this blog. But, as we know, the majority of people are straight. For now, anyway.
Naturally, this makes it a heck of a lot easier for straight people to find straight people. But what if you’re a lesbian looking for another lesbian (or a bisexual, let’s not be exclusive)? I’ve spoken to a lot of people who are under the impression that finding other gay people is like finding a needle in a haystack. But the truth is, it’s easier than you might think. Not sure where to begin? I’ve taken the liberty of breaking it down for you:
1. Lesbian dating apps
These days, it seems every happy relationship began by “swiping right”. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that! There used to be a stigma surrounding online dating (and perhaps there still is, a little bit), but it really is a fantastic way to meet available humans in your area. Whether you’re gay, straight, bi, queer or confused, there are numerous apps and sites out there that can help you out in the dating department! We recommend trying Tinder (classic), Find Femmes (we love their Instagram feed), or Her (seems to be generally well-liked among the lesbian community).
2. Social media
The number of friends I’ve made on social media is truly astonishing. And if my (rather anti-social) personality has managed to attract this many platonic relationships on platforms like Instagram and Facebook, imagine how many romantic ones are out there just waiting to emerge! Word of warning: If you’re going this route, don’t be creepy about it. The primary purpose of social media isn’t to help you find a date, after all. But it can certainly help you meet new people… and that’s a good place to start!
3. Good ol’ fashion face-to-face communication
Picture this. You walk into a coffee shop and spot a pretty girl from across the room. You pull up your big girl panties and approach her, casually admiring her outfit. “I love your outfit,” you say. “Thank you,” she responds, blushing. You strike up a conversation. Small talk, mostly, but the chemistry between you is so obvious a blind man could see it. You offer to buy her coffee and she accepts. You sit, you talk, you laugh. And there you have it, folks. A date – just like your Grandmother told you it used to happen in the good ol’ days. Another word of warning: not everyone who accepts a cup of coffee and is giggly by nature is gay. This is something you’ll have to establish with certainty before “making a move”. Not sure how? Click here.