How do I know if I’m a lesbian?

How do I know if I'm a lesbian?

If you’re questioning whether or not you’re a lesbian, you’re off to a good start. Here’s how to take your curiosities to the next level.

The short answer to this question? You just know.

In reality, it’s not that simple. But chances are, if you’re grappling with the possibility that you might be a lesbian, you’re at least curious and/or confused – which is a good start. It might seem really scary and extraordinarily inconvenient, but I assure you, it’s for the best. There’s never a bad time to start asking questions about who you are, whether that means re-evaluating your career path or turning your identity on its head. At the end of the day, if there’s a part of you that’s even the slightest bit unhappy, something has to change.

No matter what it is you’re unsure about, the first step is to start reflecting. Ask yourself simple questions like, “What are some traits I want in a partner?”, and some difficult ones, like, “Am I ready to leave my current relationship to explore a different sexuality?” Once you’ve taken some time to think (and write, if you’re into journaling), it’s time to be brave and make a decision. You can either stay in your comfort zone where everything is familiar, or you can start exploring.

Maybe those “feelings” will go away. Maybe, if you smother them and deny them and pray them away, they’ll leave you alone. But chances are, they won’t. Chances are, they’ll haunt you until you decide to give them the attention they deserve. Either way, regrets are inevitable. So what’s it gunna be?

The best way to explore your sexuality is to start dating women. Worst case scenario: you have a few awkward dinners and have to go crawling back to your boyfriend. But if all goes well, these few dates could change your life. They could open your eyes to a part of yourself you didn’t know existed, and trust me — it will feel so good to acknowledge that latent truth.

Being scared is inevitable, so don’t let fear stand in your way. At the end of the day, the only way to know if you’re a lesbian is to give that lifestyle is fair chance. If you have any questions along the way, don’t hesitate to shoot us a message!